Behavioural Control is the core of leadership in most species. It’s a complex topic and will require several topics and almost certainly, many rewrites.
Behavioural control can be exercised for many and varying outcomes. Controlling Behaviours in itself, is neither good, bad, evil, sexist, or any other elevating or degrading function. The determinant of whether it’s good, bad, evil, sexist, manipulative etc is the intent behind it. Using Controlling Behaviours to convince others on a deserted island to set up shelter and gather food is leadership. Animal herd leadership can’t even be commenced without Behavioural Control. The real question is what’s the (often hidden) intent. Here’s where it all goes to the dogs, REAL QUICK.
Before we even consider what’s sexist, what’s feminist, what’s Radical Feminism, let’s have a laugh together. Anyone saying there’s really true equality between genders would have to believe a Reverse Gender of this presentation would be realistic. Can you ever imagine females participating? That’s thought is hilarious!
I reckon it’s funny viewed either as it is or imaging the reverse.
Behavioural control is a very necessary. So much so, I feel safe in saying I don’t know a single person that doesn’t use it. Think I’m wrong? Did you cry as a small child to get what you wanted? Have you ever told little white lies to help someone feel better? Have you ever changed verbal tonality to be more convincing?
How far is acceptable? Emotional blackmail? Well, that depends how much you really believe you should get what you want doesn’t it? It also SHOULD ask if getting what you want is taking it from others rather than earning it.
Below this line is currently just notes for future continuation
Most controlling behaviours use one or several of the following The primary areas to be touched on here are:
- Establishing or displaying dominance
- Eliminating or reducing opposition
- Getting what you want
- Ensuring ongoing compliance
- Selective delivery of Affection (and Sex)
- Selective withdrawal of Affection (and Sex)
- Promise (blatant or subtle) of Affection (and Sex)
This list is by no means finite and without doubt, behaviours and purposes intermingle. Initially, this is just providing the very basics with future additions by far more qualified people.
For any controlling behaviour to work, there has to be Delivery then Acceptance. Where individuals can’t convince others on their own, controlling individuals will use emotion to form gangs, groups, tribes and armies to overpower those rejecting there demands. What’s the most effective way to unite gangs, groups, tribes and armies? Truth, facts and logic or Emotion based ideologies? I’ll let you work that out as you think about the rhetoric that goes on prior to every battle or war. Does an army commander tell his troops the enemy is consuming 7% more food than their fair share, I doubt it. How many soldiers have been killed in action because they bought into the narrative the enemy soldiers would rape their wives and kill their children? Those stories have united action since tribalism.
How do you KNOW someone is manipulating you? Victimhood is usually the top indicator, When a person uses blame shifting, deflection or argues that a behaviour you both use is only immoral for you. The classic is the smallest infraction (non-violent) against a woman is outrageous domestic violence but stabbing a sleeping man is self defence as per the Radical Feminists famous “Battered Woman” legal defence.
The next clear indicator is when their argument is based in (usually illogical) Emotion based, targeted to the other person’s fears. How do you be certain it’s manipulative control instead of fair criticism? Research and prove facts. Look for properly researched data, ignoring non-objective data (prefabricated or controlled by the person or group exercising control) supporting the claims.
Manipulative Behavioural control can be spread over years or be constructed on the fly, mid-argument. A relationship between 2 manipulative partners is extremely dangerous when both are trying to outmanoeuvre the other. In many, many cases, this is the root cause of mutually violent Domestic abuse. Just think about the frustration where both people are prepared to ignore the other person’s feelings then do or say anything to either “win the argument” “be RIGHT” or “be the bigger victim”.
Compound this with victimhood score-keeping of past conflicts and you’re literally sitting on a powder keg. Once you see manipulative patterns repetitively and it’s clear the arguments are clearly manipulative, just walk away. People who use deliberately manipulative behaviour lack the moral compass to ever look inward at their own faults honestly. Those that practice manipulative behaviour, even when clearly caught will only ever stop temporarily to rebuild credibility. When cornered, they’ll even give a few small sacrificial lambs to be convincing, admitting smaller bad behaviour.
It doesn’t matter if you love the manipulator, whether they’re male, female, gay, straight, transgender, gender neutral or a gelded horse wearing 3 hats, no matter how strong the promises to stop manipulating, they’ll only stop until they’ve rebuilt credibility. A broken moral compass can’t be fixed even by good psychologists. A good manipulator will convince the psychologist they’re;
- trying to change, or
- their partner is the problem, or
- they’re unable to control
- a combination of both.
What makes you think you can change it? Their commitment? Yeeeaaaah! That’s where this saying comes from “A leopard can’t change it’s spots”.
Joke Of The Day
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Ten. One to screw it in and nine to form a support group for Survivors of Darkness.